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Category: Local News

Entries concerning the daily goings-on in my own life.

This category also has the following subcategories [number of entries in brackets]:


Ever have one of those mornings where you wake up and realise you’re emigrating to China later that day?

Eep!

In: Local News & China / Sinonews

2006 / 02 / 16 – 07:15 | Comment [6]Top


Although in general I’d really like it if all of my friends lived in one huge mansion and I could see them all at once all the time, there are benefits to having them scattered about the place — one of which is being invited up to Leicester for another long and very fun weekend of goodbye-ing, involving almost equal measures of alcohol and cheese in various guises.

Whilst not comprising quite so much the element of surprise as my other big send-off, this one did reveal that chillies soaked in vodka, filled with white chocolate and dipped in melted dark chocolate, are actually rather delicious, and that the residual vodka packs an unexpectedly warm kick. High on fondue and lovely company, Thursday night featured my first and last ever, never to be repeated, live guitar and vocal performance, of probably the only blues song to be written about a broken futon. China doesn’t know what it’s letting itself in for, does it?

In: Local News

2006 / 02 / 13 – 14:14 | Comment [2]Top


You know you’ve made the right decision about leaving maths behind when you receive an email about an upcoming Group Theory conference, and you read it as Group Therapy.

In: Local News

2006 / 02 / 08 – 11:24 | Comment [1]Top


Kung Hay Fat Choy Chinese restaurant badge

Bit of a treat this weekend in the form of the worst-kept-secret-ever surprise leaving do, held by a group of my friends in honour of my impending departure for Chinese shores a week on Thursday [eek, is it that soon?]. My keen analytical mind figured out something was afoot when I was asked what dates I was free over the next few weeks “for no particular reason”, as well as me telling everyone that if I didn’t have a surprise party I’d be most upset, but nevertheless it was still very nice to see a large number of my close friends and be treated to drinks and a slap-up meal [at a Chinese restaurant in London’s Chinatown, natch].

There were still a couple of nice extra surprises — an old friend whom I’ve not seen in a good couple of years [but who, as I learnt, reads this site on an almost daily basis — hello Jon!], and the most surprising aspect of all: me managing to hold down my food as I was bought many a nasty drink, the culmination of which was some mysterious clear shot at the restaurant, described as “Chinese tequila”, that smelt like fish and took all the will in the world to bring the glass anywhere near my lips, let alone drink its contents. But down it I did, and I got a lovely pot of jasmine tea for my troubles from the sympathetic waitress [although this may have been insurance against having to clean up any mess I looked as though I was about to make all over the table before the colour of my face returned from off-green to its usual shade].

Other surprises during the evening:

  • My friend finding £100 sticking out of a cash machine with no-one in the immediate vicinity [she says]

  • Actually managing [eventually] to flag down a taxi on Oxford Street at one in the morning, and having an entertaining and intelligent conversation with the driver [at least, I think we did, I can’t actually recall what was said, except for some stuff about his hat not being anything to do with where he was originally from]

  • I can dance around disturbingly competently in knee-length boots with four-inch heels

I do love my friends, and I think we’ll leave it at that.

In: Local News

2006 / 02 / 06 – 15:10 | Comment [3] | Trackback [1]Top


The train manager on my journey up to Leicester yesterday raised a few smiles with his greeting as we set off from St. Pancras:

Good morning, I’d like to welcome you all onto the 10:55 fast service to Nottingham, calling at Leicester and Nottingham only. Coach A has been designated a Quiet Coach: use of mobile phones in this carriage will automatically trigger the ejector seats. Also please note this is a non-smoking train; all toilets have been fitted with smoke alarms and high-pressure water jets.

In: Local News & Travels

2006 / 01 / 26 – 11:13 | Comment [1]Top


Mosaic of my twenty most favourited photos of 2005

2005 was officially The Year I Got Into Photography, and I’ve been particularly pleased that [minor trumpet-blowing ahoy!] a few other people liked my efforts enough to mark them as “favourites” when posted on Flickr. So, prompted by the FlickrBlog post, I’ve assembled the twenty most favourited photos of 2005 into a Flickr set for posterity.

In: Photos / Flickr & Local News

2006 / 01 / 05 – 08:33 Top


Fireworks display at midnight outside The Carpenters Arms pub

For the second year in a row I spent New Year’s Eve at my friend’s parent’s pub in Sussex, and it was every bit as good as last time: open bar, delicious nibbles, random music, a good mix of old friends and new people to talk to, and an impressive fireworks display to ring in the New Year. Have a good one, people.

In: Local News

2006 / 01 / 01 – 17:20 | Comment [1]Top


I can’t possibly write about this now — I’ve been up for twenty-six hours straight, having gone straight to the pub at half past nine this morning after an eleven hour shift. Suffice to say: everyone’s my best mate, they are…

In: Local News / Crisis Open Christmas 2005

2005 / 12 / 30 – 18:29 Top


Volunteering for Crisis continues to be a terrific experience; even though I have only seen the night-shift in operation, when there are nothing like as many activities and events happening throughout the shelter, it is still impressive how things are coordinated so well. This was especially true of the Christmas Day night-shift, when we had forty fewer volunteers than expected, and were providing accommodation for more guests than any Christmas since 1992. Due to the need to do staggered rotations in assigned tasks, each duty was lasting about twice as long as normal, particularly tough on those who were outside the shelter watching over entrances and exits. But these long shifts gave me much greater opportunity to talk to the guests in more depth than I had managed up to now.

In: Local News / Crisis Open Christmas 2005

2005 / 12 / 28 – 01:54 | Comment [1] | Trackback [1]Top


The first night at Crisis was fantastic: lovely volunteer people, and genuinely grateful [for the most part] guests. I was really nervous to begin with, and for extra fun my first task [with my fun new pal Sarah — you’re always with at least one other volunteer on any given duty] was to shut down the TV area nearest the sleeping tents, pulling the plug on the telly and asking people if they wouldn’t mind awfully moving to the other side of the arena. As you might expect, and they had my sympathies entirely, this was met with a few protests, but eventually everyone complied.

Other duties throughout the night: being a “runner” for the toilet/shower areas, fetching supplies from the store cupboard [nice and relaxed: they hardly needed anything, so I spent most of the time folding clean towels into bags with the lovely Kelly]; guarding the volunteers’ entrance/exit [a bit cold but kept warm with foot-stamping and chatting to a very sweet girl called Gemma who was very pleased to have finally turned eighteen and been allowed to volunteer]; and finally, a general clean-up of the sleeping area: folding blankets, stacking beds etc.

Everyone was really friendly and, as we were told at the debriefing, the night passed without any major incidents — a few of the guests’ tempers got a bit frayed but I’m hoping that was just first-night jitters. I didn’t feel as tired as I thought I might do — plenty of tea at every given opportunity certainly helped that. In fact, the only low point was when I bit into a small pie thinking it was going to be a mince pie, only to discover it was apple. Very disappointing!

If I was ever in any doubt that the efforts of Crisis are futile, those were surely blown away by the guest who strolled up to me and two other volunteers, took our hands in turn and thanked us all for giving up our Christmases for him. Warm fuzzy feelings aplenty!

[Aside: plural of Christmas, anyone? Christmases? Christmasses? Christmi?]

I’ve had a bit of a sleep today, and am feeling okay for another night, but I’ve a feeling this one may be a bit longer than the first. And there’s the added of fun of no public transport tomorrow morning!

Merry Christmas everybody.

In: Local News / Crisis Open Christmas 2005 & Indexed & World News

2005 / 12 / 24 – 17:26 | Comment [5] | Trackback [1]Top


In preparation for my night-shift duties at the Crisis shelter, I’m staying up as late as I can manage tonight, to begin shifting my bodyclock towards the nocturnal mode of life. Having never done anything like this before, I’m unsure…

Read the rest of “Nightowl”…

2005 / 12 / 21 – 03:30 | Trackback [1]Top


Over the Christmas week I’m volunteering for Crisis, the London-based charity for homeless people. Their work carries on year-round, but they are probably most famous for the Crisis Open Christmas scheme, started nearly forty years ago, which provides shelter, hot…

Read the rest of “Crisis Open Christmas”…

2005 / 12 / 11 – 10:40 | Comment [1] | Trackback [1]Top


I was waiting for a friend outside Holborn tube station yesterday, my first venturing out into cold and dark London since I returned from my holiday. It was around half past five, so there were hundreds of people bustling past,…

Read the rest of “Keeping my eyes peeled”…

2005 / 12 / 08 – 11:31 | Comment [5]Top


There comes a time in every man’s life when he must go on a month-long holiday to South America. For me, that time is now. Hasta luego, gringos….

Read the rest of “Adios”…

2005 / 11 / 01 – 09:39 | Comment [7]Top


It’s that time of year again, when I defer my student loan repayments for another twelve months [hmm, is my gross income less than £2011 per month? Let’s see … £0 divided by 12 … yep, I think I qualify!],…

Read the rest of “No honour”…

2005 / 09 / 21 – 11:28 | Comment [1]Top


Happy birthday to me. Now that I am twenty-nine I can do all those things that twenty-eight year olds can’t get away with: namely, fretting about turning thirty next year, and lamenting those carefree days when I wasn’t twenty-nine. Or…

Read the rest of “The big two-nine”…

2005 / 09 / 09 – 09:46 | Comment [12]Top


I went for a few drinks yesterday with an old friend that I’ve not seen for ten years, choosing to sit in a rather unglamorous old pub in Islington — imagine a nice trendy bar, all crisp and clean and filled with…

Read the rest of “Paparazzo-free zone”…

2005 / 09 / 07 – 09:07 | Comment [7]Top


“Excuse me,” said the middle-aged woman who approached me as I stared at the selection of beans in my local supermarket. “Sorry to bother you, but I was just wondering: are you spying on me?” “Errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr,” I said, as I…

Read the rest of “Double bluff”…

2005 / 09 / 06 – 15:50 | Comment [6]Top


It’ll take a few more days for my broadband connection to be transferred to my new address, so I’d been back in the dark ages of dial-up since I moved down — until today, when I discovered that some nice person in…

Read the rest of “Piggyback”…

2005 / 08 / 31 – 16:03 | Comment [7]Top


After forking out fifty quid for my yellow fever vaccination, there’s a small part of me that’s slightly disappointed that I don’t seem to be suffering any of the advertised side effects; if I’d had any of the dizziness or…

Read the rest of “More mellow than yellow”…

2005 / 08 / 23 – 21:21 | Comment [3]Top


What is one supposed to do upon receiving an email that has the following gist? Damn, you’ve already got the Gmail address I was hoping for, so I’ve signed up for one that differs from yours by one letter. In…

Read the rest of “Etiquette question”…

2005 / 08 / 23 – 06:49 | Comment [10]Top


Right, I’m off to Argentina and Bolivia….

Read the rest of “Destinations”…

2005 / 08 / 19 – 13:35 | Comment [3]Top


Frankly, I’m amazed that one can even shop for immunisations, let alone that is it is actually worth doing. I’m off on holiday to somewhere quite exciting but also a bit dodgy infectious-disease-wise in November; I’ve not mentioned this yet…

Read the rest of “Shopping for vaccinations”…

2005 / 08 / 18 – 16:09 | Comment [6] | Trackback [1]Top


It must be really exciting, buying a house. I’ve never done it myself, but — after all the trudging around, looking at different locations and properties — settling on the one you want more than any other, must be quite thrilling. And even before…

Read the rest of “It’s not completion day yet”…

2005 / 08 / 09 – 20:27 | Comment [8]Top


In order to both reduce the amount of packing I’ll need to do when I move house, and to raise some extra pocket money [my grant ran out in March and there’s no teaching over the summer], I’ve offered-up quite…

Read the rest of “Off-loading”…

2005 / 07 / 29 – 12:29 Top


A whole cat’s tail Ick. When I looked out onto the garden yesterday I saw a fair amount of white fur scattered around one part of the lawn, but just assumed there’s been a bit of a scrap during the…

Read the rest of “Things you don’t expect to be clearing up off your lawn [#574]”…

2005 / 07 / 17 – 21:31 | Comment [5]Top


I’m not really one for standing up on stage and performing for an audience. I don’t even enjoy lecturing or giving talks, so the thought of doing something that requires a bit more … showmanship … doesn’t sit well with…

Read the rest of “My reasons for not watching War of the Worlds may be slightly different from yours”…

2005 / 07 / 04 – 23:39 | Comment [3]Top


I’m fast running out of bat-based puns for these entry titles….

Read the rest of “Batter still”…

2005 / 06 / 18 – 00:23 | Comment [2]Top


Ask them seemingly random personal questions when they least expect it. “Are you on holiday?” the woman asked me as I crossed the road from the University, on my way home for a spot of lunch. It’s perhaps a telling…

Read the rest of “How to baffle Davids”…

2005 / 06 / 17 – 20:40 Top


Patience is a virtue……

Read the rest of “Better bat”…

2005 / 06 / 11 – 22:18 | Comment [7]Top


Ask them impossibly difficult questions. Such as, “Who’s calling?” The scene: a private number calls my mobile. I answer. Cold-caller Hello, this is the mobile phone company. According to our records, you’re still with … Orange? Me Erm… Sorry, who’s…

Read the rest of “How to baffle cold-callers”…

2005 / 06 / 08 – 15:14 | Comment [3]Top


I’m not sure if it’s because of the new night lights in the back garden, or because it’s the time of year, or because they’ve just moved into the area, or because I’ve just never noticed them before, but…

Read the rest of “Batty”…

2005 / 06 / 07 – 12:43 | Comment [14] | Trackback [1]Top


At long last, everything that got all messed-up by the mugging has been set right: all the money which was taken from my cards has been reimbursed, and I have a working ‘phone. In fact, because during the two-faulty-‘phones palaver…

Read the rest of “Moving in the right directions”…

2005 / 05 / 22 – 16:35 | Comment [1]Top


I went down to the Police HQ yesterday to have a look at some mugshots to see if I could identify any of them as my muggers. I really only have a clear image of one of them, so that’s…

Read the rest of “Nophoto”…

2005 / 05 / 08 – 11:56 Top


The news of the death of Bob Hunter, co-founder of Greenpeace, has gotten me thinking back to my days as a Greenpeace canvasser in Toronto, in the summer of 1996. If you’ve know me for more than ten minutes then…

Read the rest of “Canvassing for Greenpeace”…

2005 / 05 / 03 – 20:04 Top


I couldn’t quite believe it when I received my mobile ‘phone bill the other day: the geniuses that mugged me used my ‘phone before I had it blocked. They made two calls, lasting a total of a minute and a…

Read the rest of “Dial 1-800-MUGGER”…

2005 / 05 / 03 – 08:17 | Comment [7] | Trackback [2]Top


Feeling more complete today, having received my replacement cards and PINs, as well as [much to my surprise] a brand new replacement ‘phone from my insurance company. I’m still not sure if I’ll remain a customer of theirs, having discovered…

Read the rest of “More human”…

2005 / 04 / 22 – 10:35 | Comment [3]Top


About two-and-a-half hours to make a statement about an incident that took less than five minutes is impressive. But that’s in no way an indictment of police work in general nor of the officer who came round yesterday evening. The…

Read the rest of “Statement”…

2005 / 04 / 20 – 21:39 | Comment [3]Top


I’ve had better Saturday nights. Walking back home along a quiet and dimly-lit pedestrianised street from a friend’s birthday bash in town, I was accosted by two blokes with the old, “You got the time, mate?”, quickly followed by, “Give…

Read the rest of “Blow by blow”…

2005 / 04 / 17 – 14:54 | Comment [13] | Trackback [2]Top


Punched in the head. Credit cards, cash card and ‘phone taken….

Read the rest of “Mugged”…

2005 / 04 / 17 – 02:03 | Comment [6]Top


Warming up for my all-out assault on the job scene, but not feeling brave enough to get started on finding and filling-in application forms, I decided to do a bit of networking. A former PhD student of my original supervisor…

Read the rest of “Plum”…

2005 / 04 / 16 – 15:35 | Comment [2] | Trackback [1]Top


I found a mobile ‘phone on the street last night — a pretty new-looking Nokia 3320 — and am trying to figure out how to trace its owner. Somebody has called it a couple of times, but hung up when I answer it, so…

Read the rest of “Quite the dinner party”…

2005 / 04 / 03 – 08:49 | Comment [2]Top


I had my first eye test for over fifteen years yesterday, so I was relieved to be told that I haven’t needed glasses all this time — my vision is “better than 20/20” according to the optician, and my eyes are nice…

Read the rest of “The eyes have it”…

2005 / 03 / 23 – 11:26 | Comment [2]Top


I don’t take the best care of my guitars. They’re in very good nick considering they’re both around ten years old, but still: I don’t own any bespoke guitar stands [the nearest wall usually suffices, which means they’ve fallen over…

Read the rest of “Fretting”…

2005 / 03 / 20 – 16:59 | Comment [5] | Trackback [1]Top


My new razor scares me. [4.88Mb Quicktime movie]…

Read the rest of “Face/Off”…

2005 / 03 / 12 – 19:42 | Comment [9]Top


To everyone who commented on the previous entry: And who says charity work doesn’t get any recognition anymore? It doesn’t do too badly for one’s visitor stats either!…

Read the rest of “Thanks”…

2005 / 03 / 11 – 21:18 Top


I could try and use this weekend’s unexpected loss [and subsequent full retrieval from backup] of my weblog database as some sort of backwards justification for not writing anything for nearly three weeks — if I’d written anything recently, the backup might…

Read the rest of “Ramblin’ on my mind”…

2005 / 03 / 09 – 08:31 | Comment [6]Top


I really didn’t think I’d reached the age of “Things sure have changed since my day”-type recollections, but the title of Lyle’s recent post reminded me of something that happened to me at school, in about 1986 or ‘87 [I…

Read the rest of “Stupid is as stupid does”…

2005 / 02 / 16 – 21:20 | Comment [11]Top


Yes I know you’re not really supposed to move people who have collapsed [unless they’d be in even greater danger if you didn’t], but the next time you find an elderly woman lying on the pavement of a main road,…

Read the rest of “Choices”…

2005 / 02 / 09 – 14:53 | Comment [4]Top


According to my calculations, this month I have been overpaid by ten pence….

Read the rest of “The drinks are on me”…

2005 / 01 / 21 – 16:10 | Comment [2]Top


That’s how the carpet-fitter greeted me when I opened the door to him this morning. And, what’s more, he was wearing odd shoes: one brown slip-on, and one grey lace-up. It’s a fantastic way to introduce yourself — you’re instantly laughing and…

Read the rest of ““I’m wearing odd shoes.””…

2005 / 01 / 19 – 13:40 | Comment [1]Top


At around four seconds past midnight on New Year’s Day, I turned to my fellow twenty-eight year olds and reminded them that we’re going to be thirty next year. Erk. 2005 is the year in which Transformers: The Movie…

Read the rest of “Feeling one’s age”…

2005 / 01 / 02 – 00:04 | Comment [2]Top


Welcome to 2005 folks. I rang in the New Year at a private party in a gorgeous little country pub in East Sussex, owned and run by the parents of a friend. Open bar, free pool table, a few…

Read the rest of “01.01.05”…

2005 / 01 / 01 – 16:47 Top


Not so much as a meteor drizzle. Must have missed us — lucky escape. So here’s where things stand at the moment: it now appears that things are not on track to finish my PhD at the end of March. The end…

Read the rest of “Kryptonite meteor shower update [amongst other things]”…

2004 / 12 / 23 – 22:32 Top


Powered by the whatever-you-want-it-to-be Konfabulator, I have a little widget that sits in the corner of my screen and lets me know the outlook for the next few days, weather-wise. It looks very nice and tidy and the images provide…

Read the rest of “Meteorology”…

2004 / 12 / 21 – 22:13 | Comment [3] | Trackback [1]Top


I knew there had to be a catch to that free flight offer I mentioned. Well, not so much a catch, but a clause which makes the deal not as sweet as we first thought. I received the second-stage form…

Read the rest of “I’m on a flight to nowhere”…

2004 / 12 / 13 – 13:36 | Comment [4]Top


It’s one of those “there’s got to be a catch, there just has to be” affairs, but for the time being it does appear that Samsung are offering free flights to one of ten European destinations from the UK. Dubious…

Read the rest of “Where do I go from here?”…

2004 / 12 / 01 – 09:48 | Comment [10] | Trackback [1]Top


Sometimes it’s hard to imagine recycling making any impact at all: we still have to have weekly visits from the dustbin men to empty the rubbish destined for a landfill site. However, I must admit to feeling a bit of…

Read the rest of “Swings and roundabouts”…

2004 / 11 / 24 – 21:47 | Comment [6]Top


BT has introduced a new service, BT Text, which — amongst other things — will convert any SMS text message sent to a landline number into a voice message read by a pretty realistic-sounding female computer voice. This is potentially a very handy service,…

Read the rest of “Reading aloud”…

2004 / 11 / 19 – 22:20 | Comment [1]Top


Sometime between me arriving home and going out the back to chuck some things on the compost heap, it snowed — the first snowfall of winter. [Okay, technically it’s still autumn, but it can’t snow in autumn, that’s just not right.]…

Read the rest of “Cold berries”…

2004 / 11 / 18 – 21:41 | Comment [1]Top


I did have a couple of things I intended to write about once the server move was complete. However, I’m having trouble remembering what they were due to being very distracted by a couple of insect bites I acquired a…

Read the rest of “Distraction”…

2004 / 11 / 18 – 11:22 | Comment [8]Top


Mobile phone-providers Orange have taken it upon themselves to update that age-old philosophical conundrum: if a tree falls down in a forest and there’s no-one around, does it make a sound? The new version goes like this: if you ring…

Read the rest of “Will they, won’t they?”…

2004 / 11 / 11 – 18:38 | Comment [5]Top


I’ve given up trying to watch the DVD I intended to screen this evening due to a temperamental electricity supply: three or four times tonight, the lights have dimmed, the microwave clock has reset and my PC has switched itself…

Read the rest of “Dim view”…

2004 / 11 / 08 – 22:06 | Comment [4]Top


As soon as I left the building yesterday, it started pouring with rain. Two fields which belong to the local Sixth Form college lie behind my building on my route home, with a path running between the two. In one,…

Read the rest of “Kick off”…

2004 / 10 / 14 – 08:35 | Comment [5]Top


Someone threw two rocks at me yesterday. Well, I say “threw” — more like, they viciously and with intent, pushed them through my letterbox. Had I been squatting underneath the letterbox at the time, they would have hit me squarely in the…

Read the rest of “Stone me”…

2004 / 09 / 30 – 00:34 | Comment [6]Top


I received a very odd mailshot today. A plain white envelope, addressed to me [handwritten] but with no postcode, second class stamp, sent from within my home city. Inside was a yellow sheet of paper on which was printed — clearly with…

Read the rest of “Clubbed”…

2004 / 09 / 28 – 00:09 | Comment [3] | Trackback [2]Top


In the market for a new MP3 player? Don’t need a silly old iPod with nine gillion gigabytes of storage space and a hard disk that will most likely soon fail with all that jiggling about that you’ll no doubt…

Read the rest of “Shameless advertisement”…

2004 / 09 / 26 – 00:07 Top


Ages and ages and ages and ages ago, during a severe bout of navel-gazing egotism, I had an idea for a series of weblog entries which would reveal quite a bit about myself or about my views on certain topics…

Read the rest of “Manualbiography”…

2004 / 09 / 25 – 10:29 Top


Two ‘plane rides [one of which was decidedly choppy], an earlier-than-previously-booked train journey and I’m home again. I really must get on that road to having a private jet: it’s just far too risky travelling with ordinary members of the…

Read the rest of “Home”…

2004 / 09 / 22 – 19:19 | Comment [3]Top


As some of you may know, my Dad lives in the middle of nowhere, in Ireland. A few weeks ago, he went away for a few days and asked a friend to keep an eye on the place. The…

Read the rest of “Gruff”…

2004 / 09 / 14 – 18:25 | Comment [1]Top


Twenty-two years after the first instance, I’ve reached the second perfect number. Fairly sure I’ll not reach the third, so better make the most of this one!…

Read the rest of “It’s my birthday and I’ll blog if I want to”…

2004 / 09 / 09 – 06:00 | Comment [9]Top


Following on from last week’s green recycling box mystery… I didn’t put my green recycling box out for collection this week as there was barely anything in it. When I popped home this afternoon, an empty green box was sitting…

Read the rest of “Now I’m really confused”…

2004 / 08 / 03 – 18:31 | Comment [2]Top


Top tip: if you’re moving out of a shared house, it’s quite courteous to not leave it until two days before you’re leaving to inform those who are remaining that you own most of the things in the kitchen, and…

Read the rest of “When moving house”…

2004 / 07 / 31 – 01:06 | Comment [2]Top


There’s one phrase that strikes me with a feeling of terror that reaches to the very core of my being. I’m not talking about the obvious ones, like “I’m late this month” or “What’s that large wet patch on your…

Read the rest of “Swizz not whizz”…

2004 / 07 / 29 – 11:23 | Comment [2]Top


Ah, hello and welcome to the one and only training session to prepare you for your new role as a kerbside recycling box collector. As you know, Leicester City Council recently introduced a scheme whereby households put a variety of…

Read the rest of “Box clever”…

2004 / 07 / 27 – 21:33 | Comment [12] | Trackback [2]Top


Poking around my bulging sacks, I see I’ve received no less than zero letters begging me to reveal the answers to my extraordinarily popular “Where’s David?” mini-quiz. Well, beg no more. Now lie down … roll over. There’s a good…

Read the rest of “There’s David”…

2004 / 07 / 15 – 18:09 | Comment [3]Top


I can scarcely believe it myself, but I’ve fallen way behind on all things bloggy — writing, reading, commenting, erm … there must be a fourth … nope, that may well be it — due to being a little busy with fuddage. There’s…

Read the rest of “Not blogging, only working”…

2004 / 07 / 14 – 21:37 Top


I got back from Durham last night on train journey which was the complete opposite of the last one in terms of quality of service — these new Virgin trains are very nice indeed. It was a good week, full of merriment…

Read the rest of “Durhammed”…

2004 / 07 / 10 – 13:29 Top


I’m away for a week at a summer school thing for mathematics postgraduates — try to contain your jealousy — at which I shall be giving a talk in front of a live audience [whilst trying to contain my bowel movements]. Don’t miss me…

Read the rest of “This one time, at Maths Camp…”…

2004 / 07 / 04 – 09:40 | Comment [4]Top


We interrupt the current run of photos from Ireland to bring you this from a recent day-trip to Stamford. It may be a little run-down these days, but where else are you going to buy your clay badgers from?…

Read the rest of “Do you need a clay badger?”…

2004 / 06 / 26 – 20:35 | Comment [4]Top


Back home again after the mother of all journeys. The flight was fine — a momentary “Oh for eff’s sake” when somebody somehow lost their credit card during their purchasing of overpriced cologne and a tacky teddy bear with a shamrock on…

Read the rest of “A plane, some trains and a couple of automobiles”…

2004 / 06 / 23 – 11:06 | Comment [2] | Trackback [2]Top


Blooming midges, making me dance for their own evil, gnashing pleasure. Blooming huge garden in need of mowing. Blooming petrol-driven lawn-mower with controls that confuse me and which confirms that I should never ever attempt to acquire a driver’s licence,…

Read the rest of “Now I remember why I avoid coming to Ireland in the summer”…

2004 / 06 / 16 – 11:21 Top


After being fairly happy with ZoneAlarm’s performance for a while, I upgraded to the full ZoneAlarm Security Suite [firewall, anti-virus, privacy controls], which allowed me to ditch Symantec’s products completely. This upgrade coincided with a new base release of the…

Read the rest of “Fortuitous fluctuations”…

2004 / 06 / 11 – 12:09 | Comment [5]Top


My Dad spent today herding stray cattle off the road in front of his house and onto safe haven in his garden, whilst simultanously ringing around trying to figure out whose they were. It took the efforts of several Gardaí…

Read the rest of “Not the reason I’m going to Ireland in a couple of weeks, but a good enough one any other time”…

2004 / 06 / 01 – 23:20 | Comment [2]Top


Almost forgot to mention: yesterday was Fuddland’s second birthday, which I celebrated in style with a specially-chartered boat party on the Thames from Westminster to Greenwich; cheesy music, over-priced [and over-consumed] white wine, a bunch of my friends and bunch…

Read the rest of “2.0027378507871321013 today!”…

2004 / 05 / 22 – 15:12 | Comment [4] | Trackback [1]Top


Frogs observed to have suffered fatal fatalities due to spinning mower blades: 0. [Yay!] Frogs seen hopping rapidly away from terrifying rotating blades of death: 2. [We have very clever frogs.] Frogs which turned out to be a rather large…

Read the rest of “Casualties of mower”…

2004 / 05 / 12 – 19:35 Top


Good idea Coming home, changing into a pair of shorts and sitting out in the garden for a few minutes of evening sun. Bad idea Deciding to tackle the increasing problem of dandelion infestation of said garden by pulling…

Read the rest of “Good and bad ideas [garden-related]”…

2004 / 05 / 10 – 17:56 | Comment [6] | Trackback [1]Top


Him Where’s Monza? Me Isn’t that Australian for “really good”? Him That’s “bonzer”. Me Isn’t that a tiny tree? Him That’s a bonsai. Me Isn’t that a Japanese battlecry? Him That’s “banzai”. Me Okay I’m out. I still don’t…

Read the rest of “Most entertaining conversation of the day”…

2004 / 04 / 29 – 16:32 | Comment [7]Top


There’s been a whole bunch of lovely things going on recently. In roughly chronological order: A load of my friends and family met my girlfriend and all wondered what the hell she was doing with the likes of me [beats…

Read the rest of “Happiness abound”…

2004 / 04 / 28 – 14:17 | Comment [6]Top


I must apologise to the residents of London: every time I come down here for a visit, the bus fares have increased. The fare from the coach station to my Mum’s place used to be 70p. The last time I…

Read the rest of “Post hoc, ergo propter hoc”…

2004 / 04 / 23 – 20:17 Top


It may not have escaped your attention that I have nothing to say for myself this week. My one and only entry in the past seven days has been about something which will prove entirely useless if I never write…

Read the rest of “This space unintentionally left blank”…

2004 / 04 / 21 – 14:37 | Comment [9]Top


Not that I’m in it for the money or anything, but I did get kind of a warm fuzzy feeling when, as a result of helping to sort out a couple of niggling CSS bugs [yes IE, I’m looking at…

Read the rest of “Making a point”…

2004 / 04 / 14 – 11:52 Top


This morning I have been mostly fooling around with Imogen. [And not for the first time.] [Via the lady herself.]…

Read the rest of “Wizardry”…

2004 / 04 / 10 – 15:10 Top


I believe I had my first modern smoothie on Nantucket Island back in the summer of 1998; my cousin was working at The Juice Guys café and I went there fairly often to see how she was doing. They offered…

Read the rest of “Smoothie operator”…

2004 / 04 / 09 – 00:14 | Comment [5]Top


My mobile phone has been increasingly temperamental of late: the symptoms include mysteriously switching itself off and — more immediately annoyingly — rebooting during the sending of a text or email message [with the message unsent]. My first port of call was the Orange…

Read the rest of “Running rings”…

2004 / 04 / 06 – 12:34 Top


A fun weekend meeting up with people I’d not seen for between five and three years, mostly consisting of “Whatever happened to…?”- and “Do you remember when we…?”-type conversations, with the notable exception of a chat I had with the…

Read the rest of “Old and new”…

2004 / 04 / 05 – 12:10 Top


A sad evening in the house tonight: after several months spent mostly upside-down, our sick fish finally gave up the ghost. I did pretty much everything I could, following the local shop’s advice: firstly adding special salts to the water…

Read the rest of “Bye bye Bob”…

2004 / 04 / 02 – 22:33 | Comment [2]Top


My April Fool’s Day weblog prank was to not do an April Fool’s Day weblog prank. Ha, got you all didn’t I? Anyone spot any good ones, or in the media?…

Read the rest of “After midday”…

2004 / 04 / 01 – 15:08 | Comment [14]Top


Fact: food — any food — cooked in, or on, an Aga, just tastes better. It’s always on, heating the kitchen and adjoining parlour. There are two oven spaces: baking and roasting. Because the heat eminates from the cast iron walls, rather than from…

Read the rest of “The Aga Can”…

2004 / 03 / 27 – 12:42 | Comment [1]Top


Operation: Turf-Shed Roof is well underway here — possibly the most unsafe building work ever undertaken, but we never claimed to be a professional outfit. Still, I think even the dodgiest cowboy builder may draw the line at standing on a very…

Read the rest of “…and we said, “Right-o””…

2004 / 03 / 26 – 11:57 | Comment [6] | Trackback [1]Top


Okay, maybe I managed to get a little bit drunk last night, evinced by the bruise on my left thigh. I was at Victoria Station and in need of relieving myself, so sought out the station’s public toilets. Due to…

Read the rest of “Barriers”…

2004 / 03 / 23 – 09:27 | Comment [