Fuddland

If you’re currently in China, follow this easy sixteen-step guide to renewing a work visa.

1. Secure a job; this could either be a renewal of your current contract or, as in my case, a new job. This latter situation is the more problematic of the two.

2. Tell your new employer that your visa will expire very, very soon. Ask them to find out what you need to do to—documents to provide, etc.—in order to get it renewed. These will probably be: copies of your passport, current visa, numerous passport-sized photos, and a copy of the rental contract for where you are living.

3. Try to get requested documents, and succeed in all except the rental contract, which for various reasons to do with confidentiality you simply cannot get a copy of, despite the best efforts of your roommate. Explain this fact to your employer, who will tell you that they think they can work round this problem.

4. Develop a nagging doubt that they can work around this problem.

5. Try to go for the medical exam required to work in China, but accidentally eat breakfast because no-one told/reminded you not to do that. Cancel medical.

6. Go on holiday to Chengdu for two weeks. [This step is not generally advised due to squeezing the already-tight time limit, but may be worth it to get away from all annoyances for a short while.]

7. Get back, and find out what your employer suggests you do in order to finish the visa application process. They will tell you to try and get the rental contract.

8. Become extremely exasperated with telling them for the umpteenth time that you simply cannot get a copy.

9. Take the rescheduled medical exam, passing it save for being diagnosed with high blood pressure. Put the diagnosis down to being really rather worried that your visa will expire in a week’s time, and decide to get it checked again when life is stress-free.

10. Get stroppy with your employer for not being able to sort out your visa.

11. Get even stroppier when they ask you if it’s at all possible for you to get a copy of your rental contract.

12. Talk to your lovely friend who lives in the building across from you. Get a copy of your friend’s rental contract. Register yourself as living at this address

13. Jump up and down making “Nnnggurrrhurrr!” noises until someone from your company takes you to the police station to complete the visa application.

14. Wait a few moments for the police to ask for something else you’ve already told your company you can’t get. This will be the letter that confirms you have ceased employment at your previous job. Remind your company that you explained to them several times that your previous manager refused to give you this letter for reasons of the utmost pettiness.

15. Be granted a two-month extension to your visa, causing high blood pressure to drop instantly, birds to start chirping once more and the bright shining sun to appear.

16. Prepare yourself to once again confront your ex-manager and demand the required letter in order to be granted the full year-long visa.

To be continued…

#1

Thanatos | 2007 / 02 / 04 – 17:43

Have you considered buying a student visa? A lot easier than a work visa, provided you’ve got the tuition fees saved up…

#2

David | 2007 / 02 / 05 – 14:12

Re #1: A little late for that otherwise good idea—full-time contracts signed etc.—but something to bear in mind for next year!

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