Fuddland

Notice in a hotel room in Nottingham:

If you discover smoke or fire shout “Fire! Fire! Fire!”

A footnote added that running around flailing one’s arms before putting a chair through the nearest window was optional.

#1

Sherri | 2005 / 09 / 29 – 19:52

I wonder if the staff is instructed not to assist individuals who only shout “Fire! Fire!”

Or individuals who shout “Fire! Fire! Fire! Fire!” (because that may be considered excessive shouting).

#2

David | 2005 / 09 / 29 – 19:59

Re #1: And surely if you only discover smoke, you should instead shout, “Indications of the early stages of a possible fire! Indications of the early stages of a possible fire! Indications of the early stages of a possible fire!”

Although in reality, due to the time it takes to say all that, it’d come out like, “Indications of the early stages of a possible fire! Indications of the early stages of a possible fire! Indications of the aaaargh … Fire! Fire! Fire!” ;)

#3

Sherri | 2005 / 09 / 29 – 20:20

Faced with such circumstances, I’m sure I’d shout something to the effect of, “Fend for yourselves, suckers, I’m out of here!”

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