Fuddland

What with my housemate being away for a while, and me not being allowed to drive her car because of some silly licensing laws, I decided to do my grocery shopping online. Despite their website still not admitting that Opera is a valid browser, I chose tesco.com to deliver the goods. [Funnily enough, disguising Opera as IE doesn’t work anymore — but getting it to pretend it’s Mozilla 5.0 does. Weird.]

As the delivery rate is a flat fee, not scaled by weight or number of items, it makes sense to buy as many and as heavy items as you can — which entirely justifies the purchase of a crate of Grolsch [as if half price wasn’t enough of a justification] and a bumper pack of Jaffa Cakes. [I know how to live don’t I?]

I booked the delivery time for “between 1pm and 2pm” today, leaving me plenty of time in the morning to pay a rare visit to campus to chat to my supervisor. I strolled home about half an hour ago, and of course the Tesco van was sitting outside my house as I rounded the corner of my road. Eighty-one minutes early! The chap was very nice though, and said it was just because his other deliveries didn’t take very long, and he’d have come back at the correct time if I hadn’t have just caught him, so I’m not going to hold it against them. [Although they did have to substitute my requested rocket salad for a tenderleaf salad, which means I can’t do the “I’m just launching the rocket” joke when I’m next preparing a salad.]

The following is an entry which follows on from the above:

1. Potatoes! [Fuddland]. Excerpt: I knew I'd forget to order something. Bugger....

#1

steve | 2004 / 02 / 02 – 12:45

Probably best that you can’t use the “I’m just launching the rocket”!

#2

David | 2004 / 02 / 02 – 12:55

Re #1: You spoil all my fun Steve! :P

#3

graeme | 2004 / 02 / 02 – 20:21

Despite Tesco’s best efforts to stem your comedy creativity surely there’s a joke lurking in there somewhere for “Tenderleaf”?

#4

graeme | 2004 / 02 / 02 – 20:23

BTW,

Grolsch & Jaffa Cakes = Dinner of Champions.

Grolsch & Jaffa Cakes = Breakfast of World Champions.

Nice one.

#5

David | 2004 / 02 / 02 – 20:45

Re #4: And this just in:

Grolsch & [Jaffa Cakes & Custard] = Pudding of the Champion of Champions!

#6

Gordon | 2004 / 02 / 02 – 20:47

Grolsch & Jaffa Cake Tenderleaf salad = Er.. barf, probably..

#7

David | 2004 / 02 / 02 – 21:07

Re #6: Er, yeah: barf definitely. The way this thread is going I should change the title of the post to its correct spelling!

#8

graeme | 2004 / 02 / 02 – 23:36

I was going to start listing random beer and biscuit combinations in an effort to push us closer to “grossed” than “groced”, but the first thing that sprung to mind was Guinness and Bourbons which actually sounds quite tasty, if a little fattening, when I think about.

#9

graeme | 2004 / 02 / 02 – 23:40

Oh which reminds me - due to circumstances too complex for me to explain, or even remember - I once had bitter (can’t remember the brand) and doughnuts. I’ve never recreated the experience but I do remember it was surprisingly palatable.

#10

David | 2004 / 02 / 03 – 13:18

Re #8: Let us know when you try it, you might be onto something. :)

Re #9: Bitter & doughnuts — is that the British equivalent of sweet & sour? ;)

#11

graeme | 2004 / 02 / 03 – 19:45

I thought sweet & sour was British (cf. chicken tikka masala). Do the Chinese actually eat sweet & sour? This is the kind of thought provoking question that could keep me up all night.

I’ll keep you posted on the Guinness and Bourbons experiment.

#12

David | 2004 / 02 / 03 – 19:48

Re #11: Drinking too much Guinness [with or without the bourbons] is liable to keep you up all night anyway, so you might as well have something to think about. ;)

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